Jerks!

If there's one key rule I live by, it's that no matter what I'm doing to never hold back. This first occurred to me when I would step onto a dance floor. If you don't realize you're having spasms, then maybe everyone else won't either! Maybe this is more of an "Emperor's New Clothes" kind of mentality. When I dance, there's a lot of kicking and finger pointing involved. If I held back it led to being out of rhythm, and going halfway through movements, stuttering, accentuated spasms, and otherwise making it even more evident I had no idea what in the world I was doing out there.

With newfound determination, mustering up the confidence at least led to me looking at least like a silly dancer. Who played a lot of DDR. At least one of those 2 are correct.

That applies to all sorts of things in life, as I found out. When you go out on a date, have a job interview, talk to a group of strangers... confidence. All-out, no reservations and no inhibitions.

The confidence itself comes (for me) from a few places. Making a decision, staying committed to the decision, and not getting bogged down in what-if situations. Not doing any of that leads to second-guessing. It'll throw you off your baseline state and you're somebody else, not the 100% natural person. That kind of failure can be the worst... when you know you did not give it your all and came up short. When you really do let yourself down. Self-sabotage, straight up.

Nevermind other humans smell fear. Oh lord, the women are the best at that. You provide a measure of low self-esteem the next thing you know you're picking up their calls at 2AM about a booty-call gone wrong and taking them shopping. Which you're paying for. And you're a guy they're not dating. It's easier said than done to have this mythical confidence for sure, but a couple of mental reminders and knowing that NO ONE deserves to be treated like a doormat are things to keep in mind. It leads to a higher quality of living and being more appreciative of things you find yourself in, as well as being more fun by not holding back and being a wet rag.

Bottom line is... be proud of yourself. And not a jerk. Don't be jerks, guys.