So... THE LIST

Man, it's been awhile since I've been out. But it looks like some things haven't changed. For every couple of cool folks you meet there's always one or two jerks. Case in point, the latest infamous exploits from a birthday party last night.

SUBJECT #1:

First off, this dude was maybe 50 years old. I saw him when he came in, and already he was a little weird. There was some kinda weird vibe or energy coming off this cat, and he had no problem pulling up a seat at a table full of coats and drinks that weren't his, and just sitting there. Yep, he just... sat there. Not to mention his eyes were corner to corner, watching. And sitting.

Thankfully, he got up. Unfortunately, that meant he was wandering around, trolling the place. Yeah, trolling. A friend of mine came up to me minutes later, saying some fogey started off asking her what she could sing with him. His suggestion?

"Fat Bottom Girls"

Awesome job, genius. Any other physical features you'd like to point out to her? Does she have asymmetrical eyes? A long nose? How about hammer toes? There's a new jingle, "The love that I see is from the largeness of your forehead."

SUBJECT @2:

"Frosted Tips" - This guy was at a table with his buddy over the course of the evening. At some point (near closing of course) this guy tried to walk over to my female friends and asked to take photos of them. The objective would be to tell them if they were hot. To his buddies. Or the internet. Who the hell knows, it was all kinds of shady anyway. Oh, I forgot to mention both my female friends are dating someone. Additionally, the girl he was mainly talking to had her bf sitting right next to her. This guy, he was a piece of work.

Frosted kept talking, and talking, and talking some more... focused on the girl and being pretty touchy. Apparently picking up girls involves trying to pick up a girl right in front of her man. Nevermind a girl shouldn't need validation from a guy anyway, much less a random dude in a bar. As it turns out, he took not a pic of the girl, but of the boyfriend. Hope you enjoyed those 15 mins., goofball.


Hooray, karaoke (this all happened at a karaoke bar)!

Wtf? Takin pics of girls so you can tell them they are hot? wtf?

Worst pickup line ever. Asking a woman to sing fat bottom girls with you. LEARN IT.

Btw... some of y'all at depaul are some assholes.

Moments. It is how we define what we are made of. I am comprised of apathy.

I am watching ingrid michaelson!

Alone on the train. Woo.

Always funny seeing dudes hit on girls on the train...

Random thought. Was jack and the beanstalk merely a foreshadowing of viagra?

Hey douchebag on a train. Yay.

Wow. Phone audition today? Was that what that was?