It's been awhile, no?

Sorry, PleasAndThankYous. I've been a bad maintainer. A really important piece of information came from Andre 3000 of Outkast; in an interview he was asked about being able to write while in a relationship, and he said he couldn't write when he was happy. Everything's all roses and gumdrops, whiskers on kittens. That makes sense, you get handed this big ball of globulous happy, and the handy razors of cynicism and snark are laid aside because the happy is good as-is. Hence, I was happy, kinda lazy, and finally found something worth getting snarky about.

I'm 27, soon to be 28. Some associates from college have since gotten married, some friends are in long-term basically married relationships, and for the past two years or so I've been in and out of dating after a relationship for 3 years. Anyway, being on both sides of the relationship fence gives me some unique perspectives to work with.

Now don't worry this won't turn into a "boo-hoo why can't I find anyone" blog. I do that enough OFF the net with friends over IM or coffee. What makes me think of this is a conversation I had with a friend where she thought a friend was settling, in the sense that the guy she was/is dating was not good enough for her. Not even touching on the issues I have with that kind of reasoning (I was a fan of Ducky being the winner at the end of "Pretty in Pink" m'self, go figure)it is an interesting situation those of us in/past our "quarter-life-crisis" find ourselves.

The date-ee's reasoning was she was getting older, and she had to keep an open mind. I've had other friends my age say the same thing. They realize Prince Charming/Rogueish Pirate/Edward Cullen doesn't exist, and while their standards haven't lowered, they've become more realistic.

I've always been a big proponent of getting what you want, and if that changes and you're ok with that, awesome. But changing only because you feel you're getting too old to be choosy or whatever, that's bull. It wouldn't be what you want, what you're looking for, and is misleading both yourself and the other person which is way worse than just rejection. That's how people spend multiple years with someone they're only kind of into, and maybe break up suddenly or cheat.

But that's where being Twentysettled comes in. You feel you have to find someone else out of necessity because you're getting out of your twenties soon, and "ohmygoodnessImightgrowupoldandalonebecauseIhavenotfoundanyoneyetwtfomgbbqamIgoingto". I'll admit, I've had my moments too but choosing to be with someone half-assed out of some ridiculous feeling of necessity? No thanks.

First date in months. Do i even remember how to do this?

Been awhile... huh?

Just got mistaken for a pizza delivery guy downtown. AGAIN.

Finally the title of the new transformers movie makes sense.. Hello plot point!

Getting back to regular life.

Transform... And roll out! Adios knoxville.

New term... Serial hitter.

Just saw kristy hemme!

In a kroger. Haven't been here in over ten years.

In kentucky!

And yes... On the road to tn! in columbus IN now.

Ha! Just got asked if i am taking summer school. Still got my youthful good looks.

Eavesdropping on a "who is hotter" convo behind me involving older women. So far... Jane fonda and halle berry.

Eavesdropping on a "who is hotter" convo behind me involving older women. So far... Jane fonda and halle berry.

No fate but what we make... No roles but those we take.

It's after 8 and still light out. I love summer.

So... THE LIST

Man, it's been awhile since I've been out. But it looks like some things haven't changed. For every couple of cool folks you meet there's always one or two jerks. Case in point, the latest infamous exploits from a birthday party last night.

SUBJECT #1:

First off, this dude was maybe 50 years old. I saw him when he came in, and already he was a little weird. There was some kinda weird vibe or energy coming off this cat, and he had no problem pulling up a seat at a table full of coats and drinks that weren't his, and just sitting there. Yep, he just... sat there. Not to mention his eyes were corner to corner, watching. And sitting.

Thankfully, he got up. Unfortunately, that meant he was wandering around, trolling the place. Yeah, trolling. A friend of mine came up to me minutes later, saying some fogey started off asking her what she could sing with him. His suggestion?

"Fat Bottom Girls"

Awesome job, genius. Any other physical features you'd like to point out to her? Does she have asymmetrical eyes? A long nose? How about hammer toes? There's a new jingle, "The love that I see is from the largeness of your forehead."

SUBJECT @2:

"Frosted Tips" - This guy was at a table with his buddy over the course of the evening. At some point (near closing of course) this guy tried to walk over to my female friends and asked to take photos of them. The objective would be to tell them if they were hot. To his buddies. Or the internet. Who the hell knows, it was all kinds of shady anyway. Oh, I forgot to mention both my female friends are dating someone. Additionally, the girl he was mainly talking to had her bf sitting right next to her. This guy, he was a piece of work.

Frosted kept talking, and talking, and talking some more... focused on the girl and being pretty touchy. Apparently picking up girls involves trying to pick up a girl right in front of her man. Nevermind a girl shouldn't need validation from a guy anyway, much less a random dude in a bar. As it turns out, he took not a pic of the girl, but of the boyfriend. Hope you enjoyed those 15 mins., goofball.


Hooray, karaoke (this all happened at a karaoke bar)!

Wtf? Takin pics of girls so you can tell them they are hot? wtf?

Worst pickup line ever. Asking a woman to sing fat bottom girls with you. LEARN IT.

Btw... some of y'all at depaul are some assholes.

Moments. It is how we define what we are made of. I am comprised of apathy.

I am watching ingrid michaelson!

Alone on the train. Woo.

Always funny seeing dudes hit on girls on the train...

Random thought. Was jack and the beanstalk merely a foreshadowing of viagra?

Hey douchebag on a train. Yay.

Wow. Phone audition today? Was that what that was?

Well just saw a couple of guys who were arrested off the red line...

Time to get some sun this weekend.

Probably one of the funniest things i have ever been mistaken for... A soldier.

Bein a geek at chicago comics.

Lol there is a person on the train looking very serious. But their mouth is covered with powdered sugar and i don't think she knows.

Wow. I am actually looking at someone who owns a unicycle and is taking it on the el. props!

What more is there to say when i feel you already wrote my lines in the script?

Dear lincoln park... plz Do away with the umbrella dance.

LEEROYYY... JENKINS!

A burger sounds so good right now...

Back from acen.... 16000 People and i got sick. Sent home from work even!

Is the internet too much of a self fulfilling prophecy?

To the four or five dudes who decided to gawk as one ogling mass and yell at the woman across the street for half a block... Douchebags.

I really wish i could step out of my body and have a dialogue...

And so i begin a new journey alone... on no one's word but my own.

Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me. There is no thrice.

The past few days equals turbulent skies, space cowboy.