Got friends in low places?

So I'm friends on the internet...

It should be no surprise that I'm on an on-line networking web site. Blogger's probably just one, but there are others (I'm sure you can guess). Anyway, like some folk I fall prey to getting caught up in celebrity. You know, being the fan of another human being, believing they can do no wrong, that they are certainly wonderful people in all aspects and most definitely deserving of my accolades and attention.

Scarlett Johannson, please write back.

On these networking sites you can most certainly find some representation of someone that entertains you. Maybe that band you <3 or someone from the evening news. In my case, some female personalities from a certain channel that starts with a letter and ends with a number. That's not M2.

Anyway, surprise surprise they were on the network, and I found them. What follows are the usual stages of disbelief, uncertainty, curiosity and finally elation/acceptance. What happened in this case, I was all ready to become a close compatriot. Until I noticed that magic phrase. You know, the one that says, "So and so has XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX friends"
w.t.f.

I could become one of many, but honestly what would be the point? A face in thousands, probably saying the same things "Thanx for the add!" "U R HOTT" "Please writ me bak k." (no joke) that have all been there before.

What drove me nuts upon perusing the pages was the kinds of comments, much the adorementioned poetry above. While some nice, others a majority of either creepy, sexual, asking for a return message, anything. Holy crap. Maybe that's why celebrities lock themselves up in LA behind a sea of bodyguards: If people do that on the net, how will the be in public? And while some comments are true gems, the are truly lost to the number of one-lliners and requests. I don't even expect a message back if I were to send one but I'd at least like to know whoever didn't have to dig thru 30 "plz picz" messages they had before getting to mine. As with most things, 90% is god-awful save the genuine 20%. And you just contribute more stuff, more drivel that's probably not being read due to the volume of stuff that preceded you.

Regardless, how about less hero worship, more demands for non-Star Trek or street fury programming? Less being enamored for people on tv and more going out to play?

I will say this though:

Thank you to the 10% who go out there and put stuff up worth reading :)

Aye-aye!

This be September 19th! Be sure to touch yourself and the pirate within! Plenty to be both-arrred about, and nev-arrr-mind the funny looks! Have fun with today, and be sure to drop anchor and grab your booty!


Savvy?


With most incredible salutations,

Red Dirk Sassmouth

My bags are packed; I'm ready to go...

I'll be off to Rosemont today, writing for www.acen.org providing as-it-happens coverage of the event! Just one of many staffers writing, I'll have my assignments and then will update @ www.acen.org as time allows.

There'll be some material to follow when I get back on Monday; count on it.

Am I thrilled? Yes. Jazzed? Yes. Can't wait for 5 PM to get the fuck here already? Yes.

72 hours of fandom and fandumb. Hopefully I see more of the former than the latter. I'm compiling my list of "to-gets" already, and can't wait to see what the exhibit hall holds for me. There's the viewing rooms, the game rooms, the interesting characters I'll be working with and running into, it's going to be a good time. I have only been to three conventions in the past but by golly that number is going to get bigger and bigger. But until 5 PM... all I can do is wait. And work. More later.

WOOOO!!! RESOLUTION! (click here for link)

Hell YES! Way to go...

WTF Bush!?

Holy freaking crap. I'll let the article speak for itself.

I thank the 80s.

For completely skewing my perception of teen-life. "Lucas." "Fast times at Ridgemont High". "Ferris Bueller's Day off". "The Breakfast Club". Most John Cusack films from this decade. Think about it. "Not Another Teen Movie" nailed a few of the conventions right on the head, especially that really poignant moment where one person claps, followed by the rest of the school, even the people that made fun of the main character that FINALLY CAME AROUND. Happy happy joy joy.

There was the snobby rich, talented, special motherfucker that made life hell for the often socially ill-equipped/misfit/poor protagonist who was special in a nontraditional kind of way (look at "Karate Kid" for the archetype of the anatagonist and "Revenge of the Nerds" as our usual heroes.) These guys always came out on top. With a bit of drive, motivation, and a montage 2 hours later, they were victorious to thunderous applause and Queen on the soundtrack.

I grew up on these flicks but by the time they would have applied to my life, I was 10 years out of date. Those "bad" guys did not exist. I ended up trying to make sense of the world by applying all those situations I only knew about from film to my everyday life, and in doing so I became those archetypes. I became that social misfit. I wasn't able to see what I was doing or catch myself because I wanted to see myself in those roles, and eventually come out on top to thunderous applause. Sadly, I had no "Duckey" or "Goose" or "Louis" to call me on my own BS. (Coincidence that two of those characters were played by Anthony Edwards? Who knows?) Cliche after cliche, "scene" upon scene was what I was doing. I considered myself so highly that I wanted to be that tragic hero. The only thing tragic was that I believed what came off of some hack's typewriter and though Hollywood = 4LYFE. But what can you do, huh? I love those films. With all the suspension of disbelief included, they told good stories. But that's all. Stories.