On playing nice, seeing a bigger picture...

Altruist -
a person unselfishly concerned for or devoted to the welfare of others, right?

Egoist -
a self-centered or selfish person


When someone finds something they want, what they really really want, they'd make it happen, right? By any means necessary? Is it worth risking everything? The hopeless romantic in me says yes, but that's conditioning from years and years of movies. The fact of the matter is life does not follow structure - (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dramatic_structure.)

Nothing necessarily finishes happily when the credits roll, as there are no credits. We have to face our consequences over and over again. The grand dramatic gesture, followed by a moment of success, then a resolution that everything ends happily? Nope, not what happens. That grand gesture works, but here's the secret; you're not John Cusack. I know, I know! Shock and amazement! Reality and circumstances don't always fall into place.

Where am I going with this? Extremes don't win out, and in the human condition we compromise for a grander purpose sometimes. Maybe it's avoiding making something difficult even harder on everyone involved (heh, almost typed "love" there) and sucking it up, avoiding the pitfalls and consequences as best we can by compromising what we put ourselves through to get us there in the first place. No belaboring a point, no beating a dead horse, accepting whatever happens and just moving on as quickly as possible. The higher calling of avoiding lots of tears, lots of awkward silences, causing the person we care about pain by making things hard for them; being selfish for our own desires about them. Counterproductive to caring about the person, isn't it? By letting them go, do we show how much we really value them by honoring their own desires, sacrificing our own? There's a part of me that says it's a two-way street, but what can I say... I'm hopeless when it comes to giving up a piece of myself if I think it'd make something easier for someone I care about. I'm a big boy, and in the big picture none of this is that terrible, but that doesn't make that pill any easier to swallow.